Lost in translation
Kate the former dancer/trainee teacher/assistant in Harold’s reluctantly went to Charlie‘s to watch her younger sister Sophie play her first gig with the floppy woolly hatted guitar strumming Noah as part of some “Save PirateNet” rally. All was going surprisingly well guitar strumming wise and Noah finally seemed to have accepted that the kiss hadn’t meant a thing, Kate didn’t love him and nothing was ever going to happen between them, when she told the behatted boy she was sorry how she’d treated him over the past few weeks and could they start again? What was that? Did Ark Boy somehow misinterpret her words as “I’m sorry for playing so hard to get over the past few weeks, I was a fool, I love you and do you still have that bottle of lotion?” Well funnily enough he did.
Keen to have some time alone with his beloved, Noah asked the unsuspecting Kate to accompany him to his van to give him a hand unloading “The Beast”. What was that? No, it’s the name he’s given his large amplifier. Pardon? No, that’s not a euphemism either. Well one thing led, as it so often does, to another which led to poor lifting technique, an attempted kiss, a horrified Kate, a confused Noah, angry arm waving, a lurking and suspicious younger sister, the secret serenading of Kate in public by an undeterred Noah, an even more suspicious younger sister, the discovery of sketches of her older sister, a broken heart, regret over nose piercing, sisterly hugs and absolutely no mention of grief stricken snogging, which was probably for the best really.
Cruel fate, crushed dreams and wheelchair-bound mothers
The ambitious Dr Rhys Lawson’s dreams of becoming a surgeon were left in tatters after falling victim to cruel fate of the changing-the-date-of-the-surgeon-programme-interview-pre-occupied-horny-personal-trainer-and-latin-music-fitness-regime-embracing-house-mate-doubles-buying-revenge kind (long story). Having turned up late and hungover for his interview, the panel of surgeons were less than impressed and not even Dr Lawson’s smarmy smile could win them over.
Oh the crushed dreams. Oh the bitter personal trainer/smarmy surgeon put downs. Oh how was he going to tell his doting, chronically ill, wheelchair bound mother of his failure? What was that? You didn’t know Dr Lawson had a doting, chronically ill, wheelchair bound mother and who could possibly fall for such a blatantly manipulative attempt by the scriptwriters to create viewer sympathy for the smarmy, shallow doctor? Quite. Alas, the caring, complex and deeply misunderstood Doctor Rhys couldn’t bring himself to tell his sick mother the truth, allowing her to believe that he’d been accepted onto the training programme and would soon become a world class surgeon. Poor Dr Lawson.
Lucas decided not to sell the garage, temporarily scuppering the proposed shopping centre development and the funding of Lou’s around the world cruise (don’t ask) and causing Toadie to have a minor broken-couch-meltdown (again, don’t ask).
The convalescing surfer-dude head teacher Michael reluctantly allowed the rather attractive Serbian beautician/hairdresser Emilia to take care of him so that Tash could concentrate on her exams but once again warned her that his daughter must never discover the full and terrible truth about the day her mother drowned.
And Dr Karl Kennedy, having spotted Malcolm and Jade canoodling in a bus shelter, later confronted his son and the personal trainer and demanded they end the affair for such things would only lead (as he knew from personal experience) to tears, heartache and perhaps the conceiving of a baby following sleep-medication-induced naked adult shenanigans with your former mistress having mistaken them for your former wife.
There’s no more Neighbours until the 16th January. Until then, have a very happy Christmas and thanks for visiting over the past few months.