Previously on Neighbours…

26 Feb

View of Pin Oak Court, (also known as Ramsay S...

Stupid Cupid

The evil one-legged Paul Robinson discovered that his sullen bass playing niece Sophie was seeing a boy named Corey (long story which resulted in yet more I-hate-you-type-sisterly-shouting) and forbade any such future seeings. But his oddly Scottish/Aussie accented son Andrew Robinson, having learnt that Corey’s older brother is a member of Red Cotton, is encouraging the young couple to continue their romance in secret in the hope that this will create an opportunity for him to manage the band and make his fortune.

Chris Pappas

Missed opportunities, sneaky business arrangements, fallings out and resignations

Afraid of jeopardising newly harmonious Greek father/son relations and terrified of entering into his first romantic relationship with a bloke, Chris Pappas turned down a date with Aiden the gay nurse. Alas, just when he’d finally resolved to ask the floppy haired, black eyed nurse out (don’t ask) he discovered Aiden had started dating a barman. Kyle Canning started paying the enterprising Callum to deliver The Erinsborough News with sneakily secreted flyers for his business in an attempt to boost demand for his handyman skills. There was yet more Jade and Kyle relationship angst, this time of the you-blabbed-to-my-sister-about-my-ex-how-could-you? kind (everything’s fine again… for now). And fed up with all the meetings and paperwork Michael Williams resigned as head teacher of Erinsborough High to concentrate on doing what he loves best; actual teaching/surfing all the live long day (delete as appropriate).

Sonya Mitchell

Skip if of a nervous disposition

Sonya, the giant smock wearing, green fingered recovering something-or-other, confessed to an uninterested Jade, a startled Susan, and later her very own beloved Toadie (after some mid afternoon lawyer/plantswoman-naked-adult-shennanigans-of-the-birds-and-the-bees-jumbo-jet-speeding-train-fountains-and-fireworks-montage-kind), that she had thrown away her contraceptive-type-pills away months ago and that despite all the “practising” that had gone on since had failed to become pregnant.

Darcy Tyler

And finally…

The dastardly Doctor Rhys Lawson plummeted new depths of diabolically despicable deviousness in his quest to claim his rightful place on the surgeon training programme. Having ensnared the unsuspecting Erin with his devilishly dazzling good looks he proceeded with the next stage of his cunning plan – to make the poor girl continuously late for lectures by plying her with drink late into the night and altering the alarm clock settings on her phone. “Didn’t Kate, the former dancer/disgraced former trainee teacher/part time assistant in Harold’s/part time party girl, inform Erin of the smarmy doctor’s plan?” you cry. She did. “And?” She slapped him, hard. “So the smug and smarmy doctor was thwarted in his Robinsonesque plan of pure evilness?” Err…not exactly. He told Erin that Kate was a madly jealous ex who couldn’t bare to see the drop dead gorgeous doctor with another woman and would do or say anything to scupper his chances of finding true love again. “And she believed him?” Naturally.

Karl Kennedy

Still, it looked like his efforts had all been in vain as Erin, having been issued with warnings of the turn-up-late-for-a-lecture-again-and-you’re-off-the-programme kind, reluctantly decided to end things with Rhys to focus on her studies. Well, half-hearted dumping led, as it usually does, to late-night-champagne-soaked-sleeve-type-kissing, sleepovers, hasty I’ve-got-to-get-to-a-lecture-and-have-no-time-to-change-and-by-the-way-you’re-dumped-again-farewells, sulking, somebody-reeks-of-champagne-at-work-observations, devious grins and not-so-innocent suggestions to a gullible Dr Kennedy that a certain trainee surgeon may have a drinking problem. “He didn’t?” He did. Jessica, the head of the training programme, later suggested Erin take some time off to sort herself out, the sensitive young doctor had an I-can’t-take-this-anymore-I-quit-trainee-surgeon melt down and Rhys immediately asked whether he could take her place on the programme. “So the smarmy Lawson succeeded in his diabolically despicable and devious plan then?” Looks like it. However, Dr K has now twigged that he was but a pawn in the loathsome Lawson’s scheming and he doesn’t look very happy about it. Not very happy at all.

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