Missed Neighbours last week? Then you missed Christmas tree hilarity, disturbing red pants, gay pride, the re-sitting of English exams, drunken-schoolie-tattoo regrets and witty graffiti. You also missed…
Stubborn mechanics and baffling job offers
Lucas Fitzgerald fell victim to sabotage of the alleged-disgruntled-Hamilton-Group-construction-worker kind and endured (as did we all) Toadie’s persistent and somewhat sneaky attempts to convince him to accept his client’s generous offer for the garage. The stubborn mechanic refused to change his mind, further delaying the already considerably delayed shopping centre. But it looks like more trouble may be heading his way as someone appears to be secretly observing the goings-on at Fitzgerald Motors. Meanwhile Toadie, the most inept lawyer in Erinsborough, was offered a permanent job by his petulant boss Peter, despite his failed attempts to convince Lucas to sell up.
Tellings off and trembly lips
Susan informed her randy son Malcolm Kennedy that she knew all about his naked goings-on with Jade the personal trainer and demanded he confess all to his poor wife Catherine when he returns to London. The trembly lipped pig keeper agreed and admitted that his dad had warned him that naked adult shenanigans with someone other than your beloved would always end badly. Having reflected upon the harsh words she’d uttered the other day to her live-in estranged husband regarding philandering, Susan apologised to Dr K and suggested that perhaps the whole hand-holding-in-an-absolutely-non-romantic-way with Jim the builder a few months back had resulted from all the hurt and pent up resentment she’d unknowingly harboured towards him (so basically it was his own damn fault).
The continuing saga of the handyman and the personal trainer
A crippled Kyle Canning (don’t ask) returned from tending to his cosmetically enhanced-on-the-cheap mother, much to the secret delight of Jade who has long since tired of the pig keeper. Moved by an early Christmas gift of a picture frame constructed by her beloved handyman’s own fair hands, she agreed to kiss Kyle under some mistletoe and not just any polite mistletoe type kiss, oh no, but one of those oh-how-I-love-you-in-a-why-do-birds-suddenly-appear-everytime-you-are-near? type kisses. Unsurprisingly this did not lead to immediate declarations of love and happily-ever-afters but to confessions of the I’m-afraid-to-love-as-I-was-beaten-up-by-an-ex-and-now-only-have-naked-adult-shenanigans-with-no-strings-attached-type-flings-with-players-and-married-men-including-Malcolm-Kennedy kind and a rather horrified looking Kyle.
The less evil of late one legged avast-me-hearties Paul Robinson quizzed the floppy woolly hatted guitar strumming Noah as to what could have possessed his niece to kiss such an oddball as he… no offence. Having learned from a reflective Ark Boy that it had probably been one of those pesky grief induced snogs brought about by learning the terrible news that the only handsome-in-an-obvious-sort-of-way detective with OCD she’d ever loved, Mark Brennan, had snuffed it, Paul immediately went and offered his condolences to the former dancer/disgraced trainee teacher/ridiculed assistant in Harold’s Store, and urged Kate to reveal all to Priya, wife of Councillor Kapoor and stand-in headteacher at Erinsborough High, as she was bound to take pity on her and allow her to continue her teacher training. But Kate would do no such thing, swearing Paul to secrecy.
Well naturally Limpalot and Noah told Priya who told Kate, who, if truth be told, was rather annoyed by all this and told Limpalot that under no circumstances what so ever should Sophie be told. Alas, Noah had already told her younger sister what he’d told Paul and Priya and upon being told this an angry Sophie stormed over to Kate’s and told her that he’d told her and demanded to know why she had not been told. Fed up, Kate has now turned her back on teaching and has decided to selflessly put herself first, to hell with younger siblings and responsibility.